tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-44799201498326908912024-03-14T02:04:49.561-07:00My Journey With ColtonThis blog is dedicated to my son Colton who has Autism. This is purely a place I use to express my personal experiences,feelings and beliefs. It is a place for others to keep up to date with my family and for others to perhaps find comfort,to not feel alone. This is not a place for debate or hating.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-86038512810868062582014-12-01T12:48:00.002-08:002014-12-01T12:48:48.348-08:00Another One That's A Bit Overdue<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Another One That's A Bit Overdue </span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> I know,I know, I have been slacking yet again. Life just gets so busy you know?! Colton started school in early September. I'm sure I had more stress and anxiety about it than he did. It has actually really been a great benefit to him. I've seen massive growth in his vocabulary and attitude towards other children particularly ones his age. In mid October he started extended days which has been tough because it wears him out and I feel as if I have even less time with him. I did quit my job at the end of October so I have actually had weekends with him which has been really great. He's starting to become really interested in letters and numbers and is just so very bright. It has been so exciting to watch him learn and light up when he gets things right. Our biggest issue lately has been potty training. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Potty Training </span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">This has proven to be probably one of our biggest challenges yet. Colton is very interested in the concept of using the potty. He knows the routine and is open to books and movies about it. However when it comes to actually just sitting on the potty he flat our refuses and if the issue is pushed he has a meltdown. I can't figure out why he is so against it. He doesn't seem to be afraid of the potty and the idea of underwear is very appealing to him but he knows he must successfully use the potty to get those. If only they made Star Wars or Angry Birds themed potty books. I could see those helping. Perhaps it's time for me to get crafty! Now on to some positive things. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Holidays </span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">For as long as Colton has lived he has been freaked out by holidays. This is the first year he has been excited for them and we have truly been enjoying it. He loves Halloween and everything that comes with it. We were able to take him to a carnival! He still wouldn't wear a costume but he was okay with seeing others in them. He is obsessed with Santa and he was actually able to sit on his lap and tell him what he wanted for Christmas (Chewbacca toy!). I can't wait for Christmas celebrations with him this year. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Making A Friend </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Colton has managed to make a friend of sorts. There's a little boy at his school who is similar in a lot of ways to him and they actually "play" together. By play I mean games like chase and hide and seek but this is a huge step forward for him. He likes to share with him (another big step). I am so happy to see this and very proud of him. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">In Closing </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Colton is making a lot of progress. So much so that I have people telling me all the time "Oh he can't be autistic" or "See, he's normal". Well that is the goal of loads of therapy isn't it?! I want the world to not see my son as a label but I do want them to realize that he is different but that it's ok. They don't always see what I deal with, the meltdowns,the extreme rigidity, the major prompting and planning that we do everyday to get through what we need to do. For example I always tell Colton the "rules" before we do anything. Such as we are going to a place to eat and here's the rules: we sit in our seat,we use quiet voices and we listen to Mama and Daddy. He repeats these several times to himself before and during and while it doesn't always work he needs that repetition to make it through. People never know what you go through with your life period. Don't make judgments about what others tell you. We are only trying to be open and fair to our son. We didn't ask for the autism but we accept it and we work with it and in some ways we enjoy it. I wouldn't have Colton be anything but himself. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> Maybe next year he will smile for his Santa picture but hey at least we got one!</span><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-79062292802287356272014-08-27T23:50:00.000-07:002014-08-27T23:58:31.232-07:00Way Overdue<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">It's really been far too long without an update. I could ramble off excuses:I had surgery,started working more often,vacation etc etc. However I just really haven't pushed myself to sit down and type. Anyways on with the updates. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">In June the day before Coltons 3rd birthday he had his last sessions with Birth To Three. It was a sad but happy moment. Colton has come so far in the last year. It's hard to believe that a year ago I had a child who did not talk and had extreme sensory issues. He still definitely has a lot to get through but Birth To Three was a godsend. I will forever be grateful for getting him into Early Intervention Services. I know those who go without these services can have a much harder time making up for them. Let me backtack a bit. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">In May Colton was tested to see if he would be going to developmental preschool. He was accepted into the program and will be starting school September 10th. I have a lot of anxiety about this. How can I be able to put my 3 year old on a school bus by himself and send him off to school? How will he deal with another person changing his diapers? How will he feel when he realizes he is alone? I'm sure I am overly worried about this but it's tough. Most parents get to have their kids at home until 5. I feel like I am having to go through this way too early. As with everything I know our family will persevere. It's just going to be a really hard adjustment. I worry that Colton will struggle with some reverting type behaviors.I worry that they won't understand him when he tries to talk,I worry he may not talk at school at all. All I can do is hope. I've been riding on hope this entire journey and I don't suppose that will change,ever. Now to talk about something great! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">In July we took a family road trip to California. This was huge,we never could have done this before. Yes, it wasn't perfect but it was better than I ever could have hoped. Colton made it through amusement parks full of people,noisy environments. He slept in a bed that wasn't his. He had his entire routine thrown off and made it through it like a champion. My son is truly my hero. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I truly hope that I can get back on this. I feel awful for not "blogging" more considering this has been almost like a form of therapy for me. I also think it's important to tell Coltons story, and to share updates with friends and family. As always thank you so much for reading and for your support! </span><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-85542373348234016082014-03-06T23:36:00.000-08:002014-03-06T23:36:26.214-08:00Our Story For United Way<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Another Opportunity To Share Coltons Story</span> </h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I was approached with another opportunity this past week to share our experience with Skip Dynamic Partners Birth To Three program and I gladly accepted. I just thought I would share what was written with you all. Albeit it isn't anything new. I'm just so happy to share Coltons progress with anyone and everyone. It will always be a journey but being able to focus on the positive aspects and joys of it mean so much to me. Enjoy! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I first noticed something was different about my son Colton when he was
very little. I brushed a lot of it aside just telling myself I was
probably overreacting. He hit all of his milestones so I figured
everything was okay. When he was fourteen months old he started
whispering and by fifteen months he stopped talking completely. We began
to worry and expressed our fears at his eighteen month checkup. Our
doctor suggested waiting until he was two before we really investigated
this. It was during this wait time I watch many other strange things
begin to manifest in my son. After doing a lot of research on my own I
began to believe he was autistic. At his two year checkup in June I
insisted my doctor refer us to Children's Autism Center in Seattle. We
had our appointment there in August and they referred us to get his
tested for developmental delay and autism. We scheduled an evaluation
with Skip Dynamic Partners Birth to Three program for that September. It
was at this appointment my son was classified as developmentally
delayed. It was of course difficult to receive but we were just happy to
be able to start helping him. A month later we had him tested at a
center in Federal Way and he was diagnosed as autistic level two. We
began therapies with Skip in October starting with OT therapy. My son
has really bonded with his OT and we have watched so much growth and
development come from it. By the beginning of November he was saying
"Mama" and a few other words. It was at this time we also added on
Speech therapy. It is now March and I'm happy to report that my son has
grown from a child who was afraid of many sounds and other children, who
couldn't talk at all to now a child who is responsive to others and
becoming very talkative. We couldn't be happier. I'm sad our time is
growing short with Skip, they have truly been a godsend to us. If you
are interested in knowing more I highly suggest reading my blog at <a href="http://coltonsmama2011.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">coltonsmama2011.blogspot.com</a>.
I am proud of what my son has accomplished and I have so much hope for
his future. We owe a lot to the therapists at Skip, they will always
have a special place in our hearts. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">In Closing </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">As always thank you for reading and for your continued support. I'm so proud of my son. Some days can be especially tough but I wouldn't change him "cure" him for the world. I embrace my sons autism. Without it he wouldn't be who he is. I continue to learn so much from him and others in the autism community. I have to admit I'm pleasantly surprised at how well we all support each other. The strongest women I have ever met I have met while on this journey and I am proud to be among them. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><br /></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-5806361537041708282014-03-01T17:05:00.000-08:002014-03-01T17:05:38.737-08:00Another Opportunity To Share My Story<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Spreading Our Story Around </span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> Last month I received an e-mail from a woman who works at WAAA asking me if I would like the opportunity to share Colton's story with them and have it go on their website. I happily agreed. I will enclose the link to it here: <a href="http://www.washingtonautismadvocacy.org/updates/2014/02/28/starting-autism-journey/">http://www.washingtonautismadvocacy.org/updates/2014/02/28/starting-autism-journey/</a> I was so thrilled to have this chance to share our sons story and possibly bring others the awareness to what is going on with insurance problems in our state and possibly reach those out there who are struggling and need WAAA's help. Now onto a few updates in our life. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Updates </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> Colton has just been talking and talking. We are finally hearing two words at a time. Granted it's almost always because he's repeating what we have said or something he has heard on TV but I am so proud. It is such a joy to hear his little voice! I'm so proud at the progress he is making and how hard he continues to work on his speech. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> We have set up his official testing date with the public schools for May 2nd. I'm nervous to see how it goes but I'm hoping that as with everything else so far we find new opportunities and chances for growth. His cognitive skills are so amazing and I hope they get the chance to see how brilliant he truly is. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> While we are still on the subject of schools we have heard that we may have a possibility of getting him into a local private preschool. While of course this may be stretching it for us financially,I can only pray that we get this chance. I feel that Colton should be challenged academically not only taught life skills. He already can count to ten and recognizes all letters and is even attempting to spell. I feel I would be failing him as a mother if I didn't try to find the best fit for school for him. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">In Closing </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> I'm keeping this one short but hope to be back here soon with more updates and positivity. I am so blessed to be Coltons mother. Everyday with him is a blessing. This doesn't mean it's easy, he can certainly be trying at times but we are weathering the storms and enjoying the rainbows that come after. I truly believe that because of Coltons autism I have grown so much as a person and gained so much insight and knowledge even just in these last few short years and I know it will only get better. The future can certainly take it's time but I am looking forward to it.As always thank you for reading and your continued support. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><br /></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-81098952085542947832014-02-10T23:08:00.000-08:002014-02-10T23:09:40.234-08:00Ups And Downs<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">Roller Coaster Ride </span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;"> </span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> The Downs </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I may as well start with the negative so as always I can end on a better note. I guess I will start with the school tours. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Public School </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">So we went about a week ago to visit the public school Colton would be going to in the fall.Keep in mind I really went in there with an open mind however what I found was difficult to process. First off the classroom is in a portable. It isn't even a real classroom. Then let's look at teacher-child ratio. There are two aides for twelve kids. It's okay but certainly not ideal. While it seemed that it wasn't a horrid place I will be honest. What I saw was chairs with restraints and what appeared to be a school dedicated to keeping these kids in special education not helping the ones who have potential get eventually integrated.Of course I am being a little biased, I truly have no real experience with the public school system and their developmental delay preschools but I just left there feeling sick. I dislike how the public school system defines my child as low functioning when I know he is very high functioning, almost a savant in some ways. I also don't appreciate that he would be only 3 years old and in school five days a week for six hours a day.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">ABA School </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">One week prior to our public school visit we went to tour an ABA school. Not only is this a school where Colton would receive all of his behavioral therapy but they are guiding children to be able to get into regular 1st grade. They divide them up by ability not how they fall on a "normal" scale. In short they would be teaching my son to read, not strapping him to a chair. Also the teacher-student ratio is three teacher/aides to one child. That in itself is amazing. Here comes the negative news, our insurance of course does not cover behavioral therapies including ABA,not only that the school doesn't even work with our insurance company brand. Oh and did I mention it's $1,600 a month if you are self pay like we would be?! Yeah well we are pretty much back at square one. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Upcoming Surgery </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I found out recently that a surgery I've been putting off can no longer be put off. It could be as easy as just three incisions and two weeks of healing or it could turn into a much more major surgery with a recovery time of ten weeks or so. This of course means it will be very difficult to deal with my toddler especially because he is so attached to me and doesn't comprehend other peoples feelings or pain (essentially like many with ASD he lacks sympathy). Thankfully my husband will be able to take some time off but I'm just having a hard time picturing how this will work out for my son or I. Albeit without this surgery things could be so much worse for everyone so I'm just going to go in with positive thinking, it's all I can do. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> The Ups </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> Colton continues to be bursting with new words. He is responding so well to therapy at this point my expectations and hopes increase each day. I am so proud of how far he has come and how hard he works. He is really into spelling lately. If he sees a word he spells it out, I could listen to him do that all day! He has started to become more confident in himself as well. I believe that he is meant for some truly great things. He has started to create real bonds, maybe it's only with adults but it's definitely a start. Raising children is hard work, raising one with special needs is indeed a journey but I wouldn't trade it for anything! What's normal anyways? :) </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">In Closing </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> Again thank you as always for reading and for your continued support. Autism awareness has come a long way but we still have a long road ahead but I truly believe that someday things will be so much better, more informative, easier. I also truly believe the key to this is education. Every time I encounter a "non believer" or a "skeptic" I do get upset but I also choose to take it as a chance to educate. Let us not forget that some people are just ignorant, what they don't know they fear, they don't understand. We as parents of special needs children are warriors, so are our children. Together we will fight their fight, even if it seems like an endless battle it is worth it! It will always be worth it. </span><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-13958595635216096892014-01-18T22:42:00.000-08:002014-01-18T22:42:24.570-08:00The Trick Is To Keep Breathing<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The Trick Is To Keep Breathing </span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">It again has been too long without an update. Life just goes by so fast and there is always to much to be done and never enough time to do them all. While there isn't a whole lot new to report there are a few updates worth mentioning. Beginning with our appointment with our DDD case manager. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">At the beginning of this month we went forward with our application for our states Basic Health Waiver through DDD. We had a 3 hour appointment/assessment with our case manager. We of course knew this process would be a long shot but it is my belief that it would be a waste if we didn't try and apply for everything out there. Today I received a letter in the mail informing us that we were being denied the waiver. Our sons name will still go into the state database and maybe someday when funds are available we will have another shot. We can still appeal this decision but acknowledging the lack of state funding we know that too may be in vain. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">A update on our insurance proves to still be tiring. They have continued to successfully avoid sending out actual documentation of a denial meaning we have no evidence to sue or appeal with. Our case manager through Aetna seems to have disappeared as well, I cannot seem to catch her. Well such is life, I'd like to step away from the negative for now and look at the positives. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">While our time with "Birth To Three" is growing short we continue to observe much progress with our son. While he still cannot seem to manage two words at a time his one word vocabulary is exploding. Our son has such a desire to absorb everything. He has such a craving for education. I have no doubt this will prove to be a major strength for him. He continues to be obsessed with numbers and letters to the point where he now sees a word and spells it out letter for letter. It may prove fruitful to start trying to teach him to read. I truly believe the capacity is there. He is also very interested in his communication board and the PECS method. I continue to try and learn as much sign language as I can since even though he is unable to use signs due to his lack of fine motor skills he does learn them and I am able to use them as extra assistance when talking to him. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> I am still having a heard time getting past the loneliness I have felt over the past couple of years. I thought by now I would be making "mommy friends" and setting up playdates for my son.</span> <span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">This still may become easier once we are in developmental preschool and I am able to be surrounded by those in similar situations. It's not that I would be against friendship or playdates with typical children and families it's just that the opportunities don't present themselves. That with the major involvement with therapy sessions and the fact that I still have to try and make as much money working two days a week as I can to keep us afloat. It all doesn't leave me much time either.</span> <span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Well enough of the pity party I do have a wonderful son who continues to fill my life with so much joy. I've never learned or loved so much in my life and for that I am truly thankful. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">In closing I would like to again as always thank you for reading this, for supporting us, for supporting Colton. We will never stop fighting. Not only for our son but for autism awareness, for all of our children who deserve everything the world and life has to offer. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> </span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-27743078039436888172013-12-16T23:18:00.001-08:002013-12-16T23:18:45.055-08:00Ups And Downs<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Ups And Downs</span> </h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I know it's been awhile since I've written an update but as you can all imagine my life can be busy, especially during this hectic time of year. We have been going through a lot some positive and some negative. Like they say you can't taste the sweet without the bitter. I'll start with the bitter so we can get past that quickly. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The Bitter </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">So I'm sure I have mentioned some of Colton's behavioral problems before but it seems that the older he gets, the more cognitive he becomes the more it seems to manifest itself. It's so hard to watch him feel the need to hurt himself,others,animals and objects. It's almost like he sets up a mission in his mind to be "mean" and can't stop until the task is completed. This is exactly why it is so important to get ABA therapy or at the very least some behavioral help from a therapist/specialist. It's just so hard to have this child who does these things who you can't seem to find the right way to teach to discipline. We can't even get him to look into our eyes let alone know that we are being serious. It's exhausting. It's hard enough for anyone to have a toddler they are a lot of work but when you have an ASD toddler it's like ten times the work and stress. Okay I think I can get past that now, I really needed to vent. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">On another "bitter" note we discovered that even though we finally got a caseworker through our private insurance she's just as clueless as everyone else. She had to e-mail me twice to learn about what ABA therapy was and what ABA stood for. Yeah,twice. To top that off we found out we do not qualify for legal aid to try and sue for these benefits due to the fact that we are income ineligible and have private insurance which they don't have "funding" for currently. It seems like we just can't win sometimes. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The Sweet </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">As I promised there is a rainbow after every storm. Colton is learning many words and very rapidly. While he still can't seem to put two words together it is becoming very apparent just how high functioning and intelligent he is. I can't say enough wonderful things about early intervention. I feel like our son is on his way to being a poster boy for it. He has already come such a long way in a short amount of time and that creates a lot of positivity for all of us. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">We also went to our first support group a few weeks ago. It was one through WAAA which I have mentioned previously, again they are a wonderful organization and if you live in Washington I urge you to look into them and join their network. It was so comforting to be in a room with other moms like me sharing their stories and thoughts. I just wish I had a way to enjoy this once a week and not just once a month. I left there feeling so empowered and ready to tackle everything I have to. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">We are also getting our own caseworker through DDA and while of course this doesn't mean a whole lot since they already have their hands so full it's at least a good feeling to know that we are beginning the long and arduous journey that comes with waiting lists through the state we are really hoping that something could come through for our son. The basic health need waiver would be a godsend. I will just continue to think positive but practical and say lots of prayers! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Earlier this month we took Colton on his first train ride. It was the Santa Train Special Needs Ride from North Bend to Snoqualmie. It was amazing. Not only did my son smile the biggest smiles the entire time but he actually got over his fear of Santa and had a blast. It was also my first train ride as well and I loved that we got to share that together. I can't wait to take him on more train rides. It was worth it and exceeded my expectations! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">In Closing </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I know we have a long road ahead and there are still many battles to fight and obstacles to overcome but it is always worth it. Colton will always be worth it. He is truly my superhero. He has overcome so much and continues too. I am so amazed and fascinated by him. He is truly a joy and such a blessing in my life and in every life he touches. People gravitate towards him and I believe that will come to be a great strength for him. As always thank you for reading this and your continued support. Have a happy holiday and enjoy it with those you love, I know I will. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> </span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-58805942344979492642013-11-26T00:02:00.000-08:002013-11-26T00:02:38.215-08:00A Little Overdue<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">It's Been Awhile </span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I feel bad that it has been awhile since I've "blogged" or given an update however I have a lot of news. Most of it pretty positive! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">More Talking </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> I am so happy to report that Colton now says "Mama" and "Dada" plus a few more things. Cutting my hours down to just weekends and getting more active therapy has really been working. I've seen so much positive changes in the last month alone and it makes me so happy. To hear my son say "Mama" made me the happiest woman in the world. I truly wanted to throw a parade. Something so many take for granted really made my day. In fact it has been the best thing so far in my life other than the day he was born. It is also awesome to note that we now have a speech therapist on board and she seems to really understand our son well. This makes me happy, we have been so blessed to have every therapist be a wonderful one. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Neurology Appointment </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> We still are on a waiting list for this but it looks like it won't be much longer. Looking like sometime in late January and while I am nervous about it I would like to try and stay positive and hope that maybe there could be a few answers to things we have been questioning albeit even if they aren't we can at least rule some things out. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Case Manager For Insurance </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> After the guidance from an amazing woman who works for WAAA (which I have mentioned previously) I demanded that we get assigned a case manager for our son and after much "badgering" we finally have one. She seems to really want to find out everything she can for our son and us. I'm so blessed to continually have so many wonderful and well informed people come into my life. Although we are surely going to have issues with our insurance we at least have found someone willing to go the extra mile for us and for that I am grateful. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Some Bitter Things </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">As with everything in life with the good comes the bad. We are finding out more and more how much Colton is struggling with fine motor skills. It is causing him a lot of frustration which results in more violent meltdown type tantrums. Potty training still seems to be something for the much distant future although we will continue to encourage him but not push it too much. I think that Colton is starting to realize that he can't do several things other children his age can and that hurts me. I feel so much for my child and watching him struggle is hard. I can see how much he wants to ride a trike, to open a door, to color and throw balls like other children his age. He truly is my hero though, he always tries and when he fails even though he has meltdowns often he continues to push himself. Just this last month he began to "scoop and pour", which is something he was really having a hard time with. He has so much drive and motivation, I am such a proud Mama. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Bright Future </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Colton is making so much progress and I truly believe he will accomplish a lot in his life. He is so brilliant and to live in his world must be incredible. I'm just happy he lets me in it sometimes. The way he sees the world and the patterns he creates are so fascinating and beautiful. I will just continue to advocate for him and be the best I can be for him. I know some who see me in everyday life may see a very tired woman and in truth I am but don't think for a second I am not always trying to be a "Super Mom", I'm just also human. Colton makes everyday worth living, every battle worth fighting. No one makes me smile like he does and I have no doubt he will bring many people happiness. I am so proud of the progress he is making and will continue to make. Thank you all as always for reading this and your continued support. </span><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-71712360867028870162013-11-05T00:38:00.000-08:002013-11-05T00:38:53.210-08:00Today Was A Good Day <h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Today Was A Great Day </span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The Sweet </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> Well to be fair things have been looking up for at least a week now. Starting last Friday one of Colton's therapists came to his co-op preschool to observe him and he did really great and was responding well.I was so proud of how hard he was working to try new things. He has been making tremendous progress in a few areas especially in speech. He now says "Mama", "Dada", "Papa", "Baby" and "Nona/Nana". This is huge for us. I'm also happy to report that we are finally getting a speech therapist for him and I feel the timing couldn't be better. Our son wants to talk, he wants to work hard. I feel so lucky. Of course with the sweet we have the bitter.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The Bitter </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> While we have been seeing a lot of improvement in some areas especially speech we have encountered some new and worsening behavior. Mainly with Colton's tendency to self harm and cause harm to other people and animals. I'm not sure if this is due to the frustration of still not having the right words to be able to communicate wants/need/emotions etc. I'm sure they play a part in it. It's really hard to kind of have to admit that your child has a mean streak, a tendency for violent behavior. I'm desiring a behavioral therapist more now than ever. The other issues have been with our ongoing battle against our insurance company. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Many of you who have been reading along probably remember how early on in this blog </span>I <span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">explained that our insurance company does not cover anything related to autism. Yeah,nothing. Our son is only 2 1/2 and even trying to get "developmental delay" covered is a struggle. I have recently hooked up with WAAA which stands for Washington Autism Alliance And Advocacy. They have already felt like a godsend. I no longer feel so alone in this fight especially after learning from them that our insurance is violating federal laws by doing this. This only adds to my need to triumph over this problem not only for my son but for the children struggling presenting and the children of the future. Part of this battle for me will have to be in taking on my husband and I's work union. Turns out that even though it's a huge union no one has ever stepped up to the bargaining table to end this problem. It's truly hard to believe that there are no other people belonging to our same union that have not encountered this problem. Nevertheless I will not stop until it's resolved,whatever it takes I will do it. After all it has to do with my child and his medical needs! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">More Sweet </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I'd like to close with some more happy news because ending on a positive note is often best. I have recently starting getting more into my local autism community,I have already met so many incredibly strong and smart women who have filled me with comfort,hope and positive feelings. I highly recommend any of you out there reading this who may have only recently had their child diagnosed on the spectrum</span> <span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">or have not yet actively sought out their local community/support groups to please do. The best resource and support we have is each other and I promise you while not everyone you will always meet will be like you,you will make some great connections and learn something new and helpful. I'm more excited now than ever to become as involved as I can be especially since it won't be long before Colton will have to get into the special education public school system. Thanks as always for reading and for your support! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">P.s. For more info about WAAA visit <a href="http://www.washingtonautismadvocacy.org/updates/">http://www.washingtonautismadvocacy.org/updates/</a> </span><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-37167853034867452402013-10-25T11:43:00.000-07:002013-10-25T11:44:23.667-07:00Book Review: "Making Peace With Autism" By Susan Senator<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"Making Peace With Autism" By Susan Senator </span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">As promised I am giving my review on this amazing book. It's safe to say that I believe every home with an autistic child should own one of these. Many of you out there like me have probably browsed or read many books related to autism but this one really stands out for me personally. I highly recommend it to those who have just began their journey but it's also a great read for anyone with a child on the spectrum and even friends,family members, and those who work with children on it. It's more like a memoir than a book filled with lots of information but I found many helpful tips and comforting relatable stories in it. Susan tells her stories in a frank,loving and sometimes funny way. Her journey is inspiring. Her use of "social story" type tools for her child are helpful and informative. Her tips and stories of making her marriage work are wonderful. Her stories of troubles with the school district are eye-opening. Honestly there isn't one bad thing I can say about this book. I can only encourage you to pick it up and start reading. She also has one called "The Autism Mom's Survival Guide" which I have just started,I will review that one as well when I am done. Again thanks for reading and for you support. </span><br />
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<a href="http://susansenator.com/blog/">http://susansenator.com/blog/</a><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"> </span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-72787501059969618732013-10-21T00:36:00.001-07:002013-10-21T00:38:00.061-07:00Some Coping Techniques And Some Tricks I've Found<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Alleviating Issues </span></h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">A few posts back I discussed the plethora of problems and emotions we as parents of autistic children are or may be facing. For tonight's post I would like to dissect these issues and share some things that have helped me and may possible help you. I think I will start with the "toughest", the emotional aspects. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Exhaustion And Emotions </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I'll start with the anxiety: While there is no "cure-all" there are certainly a few ways to help you deal. Some of this may sound cheesy but a lot of it is pretty basic. It does help if you can get by yourself for a few minutes (even if it means taking a "time out" from your child,I find the bathroom can sometimes be the best place for me) and take lots of deep,timed,and relaxed breaths. Also I find that being able to vent to someone or something (such as this blog) can help tremendously. I like to call it "emotional vomiting". If you keep it all going around and around in your head all you will find is more anxiety,negativity and depression. I have some major issues in this department. I'm so naturally prone to anxiety. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Fear: This is another one that is tough to deal with. Especially in the beginning (and I'm still in the beginning!). There are so many questions,so many "what ifs". Honestly the best advice I can give you is if it is a "reasonable fear" then I encourage you to seek out the answer,whether it be by your own research or by talking to a doctor,therapist etc. If they are more "unreasonable" then why not try to just shoot for what I call "short-term goals". If you are so obsessed with getting your child potty-trained and it's more feasible that your child learns to express "yes" and "no" then refocus your attention to the maybe easier and more important goal. I have discovered that this is pretty crucial. I could spend all day obsessing over what my son may or may not be able to achieve/do someday but I know that my focus needs to be on the present. Would it really change how you feel about your child? Probably not so do them and yourself a favor and focus on them and their current work towards certain goals. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Exhaustion: This one is an emotion that I am sure we are all feeling,by being a parent in general not just a parent of a special needs child. Kids will wear you out. Having all the extra stress,anxiety etc. can just wear you out. I wish I had a "magic cure" for this but sadly I do not. My best advice is to ask for help. Maybe from a spouse,friend or family member. Sometimes we need a nap,we need a coffee trip,a bubble bath in a quiet house,a chance to read a book,to write,to catch up with friends. I guess this paragraph also can touch on the "social life" issue. While being able to have these resources or opportunities(I can't often!),surely you can at least try. I wish I had more to offer on this one since it seems to be a problem I face constantly and I'm sure a lot of you are as well. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Feeling a lack of support: This one sounds easy but it can be tough. Ask for help,ask for them to educate themselves and keep trying. Chances are they won't work extremely hard to reach out to you so you have to just suck it up and either decided to cut some people out of your life or to fight to keep them in. Having a child with Autism may mean that some people could possibly drop out of your life or you may have to ditch them. Your child and his/her needs are a priority as it should be for any parent. Being a parent of a special needs child requires even more work and attention. If they don't understand and don't try to then they just aren't worth the worry. If they are someone you really want to keep in your life then as I said above: Try,Try,Educate. There's nothing wrong with that. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Lack Of Affection,Marriage And "Comparison Game" </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Lack of affection:What works for me of course may not work for you but I have come to find that there are other ways to obtain the feeling of love and affection being reciprocated from my son. The main one is squeezing. It's no secret,lots of autistic children love the feeling of being squeezed whether it be by a tight hug or a gentle squeeze of the arm. In fact I decided to try this method based on other stories from parents of autistic children for whom it worked for. I was very pleased with the result. Colton loves being squeezed,I find that if I give him a really tight hug he will reciprocate and will also often ask for "Mo" (his way of saying "more"). I love it! I have also heard about "brushing" I am not educated or experienced enough to give my own opinion but I hear it works great even as a therapeutic tool. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Marriage: Again it is a proven statistic that 80% of marriages that between parents of special needs children end in divorce.This is very alarming and discouraging.However I think there are a few good options out there. I haven't had to go as far as marriage counseling but I do hear it works well for couples who have reached a breaking point and who are at odds over how to raise their child or about the diagnosis itself. I personally think think that the best tool to use is to spend time together. This may not be easy to attain (my husband and I work opposite shifts and don't really have anyone to watch our son) but it can happen.You have to make it happen. Even if it means trying to have frequent phone calls,text messages or late night talks in bed. You can find at least a few minutes a day to connect. When I say "connect" I mean by taking time for each other that doesn't involve "autism talk",errand running or arguing. This can be tough to do since you have to make you child the center of everything,the main priority.I like to bring my husband dinners at his work or send him goofy text messages or remind him of inside jokes.These little things make a difference,it's how we still stay "us". </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">"Comparison Game":This one simply can be overcome (at least for the moment) by instead of choosing to see what your child cannot do to chose to see what he/she can do,what they excel at. Every child has something they are good at.Many autistic children often are advanced in many areas their peers are not yet. For instance Colton can pick out all letter in the alphabet correctly,or the fact that he knows most all of his colors and can sort objects into groups by their color.I find these things amazing and wonderful and when I often find myself talking to other people about their child's development or they are asking about mine I choose to push aside the anger or depressed feelings and brag. Every parent brags about there child why can't we?! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">"Know It All" Doctors,Waiting Lists And Insurance Problems </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">"Know It All" Doctors: This one can be conquered simply. Change doctors or insist that they listen to your appeals and intuition. I've come to find that if I educate myself before an appointment I get my point or goal across much more easily. If I know what doctor,therapist,neurologist and/or treatment plan I want I tell them flat out that I want a referral and this is who/where/what I want it to go to. Simple as that,if they don't listen then again just find a new doctor.Trust me you will go through many different people on this journey anyway. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Waiting Lists: This one is not as easy.My best advice is to keep calling.Sometimes,albeit rarely they do have cancellations.While you may have to act quickly and re-order your schedule,do it. You may not have that opportunity again or even in the near future. How I ended up getting Colton into his initial evaluation at Children's Autism Center was by calling a number of times and at last I called and heard there was a cancellation. For the most part just make sure they are aware of you and your child.Have other facilities keep them up to date by faxing,mailing or e-mailing them reports or notes. It isn't easy but keep trying,it's for your child! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Insurance Problems: This one is the toughest of all. Sometimes you may find a way to get help many other times you may not. As I have mentioned before our insurance does not cover anything "autism related" and we do not qualify for any state grants or programs. There are a few routes you can try: create a "GoFund Me" account or make a "benevolent" account at your local bank,share this information with friends,co-workers,and family. You may be surprised to find some people may offer help although don't expect too much,times are rough on everyone right now and that's also not the most important support you can receive from them. Try for hospital financial aid. We recently received approval from Children's hospital although this means it is only limited to anything we receive there it's at least something. Try to make extra money:you could take surveys on the internet,it won't net "fast money" but sometimes you can receive products to test and get paid for,we just recently finished a sippy cup one and will receive $75 dollars for it. You can also find "odd jobs" or do a garage sale.Anything helps and anything is worth trying. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">In Closing </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I hope some of the tips I have offered help some of you out there. This is a life-long journey and it will be full or "trial and error" but it's all worth it. The best thing we can do is keep our eyes on the goals,the achievements and the blessings. Currently I am reading a really good book called "Making Peace With Autism" by Susan Senator,I will review this when I am finished but I do recommend picking it up especially if you are at the beginning of your journey. I also would like to ask you who are reading and in a similar situation as me to share your thoughts,tips,and coping skills. The best resource we have is each other. Thanks as always for reading and for your support. I leave you with Coltons newest achievement,enjoy! :) </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><a href="https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=683514538327938&l=4606357448247940537">https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=683514538327938&l=4606357448247940537</a> </span><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-52459541930430251322013-10-16T22:46:00.000-07:002013-10-16T22:46:16.736-07:00Sharing An Excellent Short Video<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">A Very Excellent Video Clip </span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I just wanted to share this with all of you. I think it demonstrates how effective ABA therapy and early intervention can be. I can't wait to get Colton started on ABA! Also be sure to click "Follow" off to the side of this blog to keep up to date with us! Thanks again for your support! </span><br />
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<a href="http://youtu.be/bG0vko7GHDQ">http://youtu.be/bG0vko7GHDQ</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-70698036785854332932013-10-15T00:27:00.000-07:002013-10-15T01:07:55.277-07:00Looking At The Positive<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The Joys Of Autism </span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Last night I focused on the difficulties many people face at raising a child on the spectrum. Tonight I would like to focus on the wonderful and amazing things that autism can bring. That my son brings to my life. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">He Is Rarely Boring </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Colton always seems to have something great and deep going on inside of his head. I love watching the "wheels spin", the way his eyes light up when he seems deep in thought. Colton is always doing something. Whether it's running around,yelling loudly,jumping,hand-flapping,dancing,even just shaking his foot repetitively. This boy is a mover and a shaker. He's fascinating to watch and it brings so much joy to me when I see him learning,creating,moving. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The Boy Has Rhythm </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> No lie,Colton can move. He has amazing rhythm for a two year old,even for just a boy in general. I've watched him jump,clap and dance right on beat many many times. Along with his gift of rhythm he also seems to have quite an ear for music. I've discovered that he has the ability to hear "inside" of a song. There are beats and sound effects a somewhat semi neurotypical person as myself would easily miss but not my son. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">An Amazing Memory </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Colton has an incredible memory. Take for instance when we take him to the doctor. As soon as we get within a foot or two of the parking lot he loses it. Of course that one can be tough but I also enjoy switching things around in the house,tiny miniscule things and watching him immediately get up in the morning and put everything back in order. You teach something to Colton one time like which letter is the letter A or which number is the number 2 and I guarantee you he will never forget. Colton may be basically non-verbal but at 2 years old he knew all of his colors,numbers 1 through 20 and every letter of the alphabet. It's pretty incredible. Of course I have no idea if he is a "genius" or not but to me that seems awfully good for a 2 year old on the spectrum or not. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Intense Ability To Focus Deeply </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Colton looks over things such as toys,books,games,puzzles etc. with such intensity it's amazing. I can't focus on anything like that. He even looks over all of the boxes of food or drink packages we hand him as if he is checking the ingredients or nutritional values. I swear if Colton just had bigger hands and better fine motor skills I could hand him a lego set instruction booklet and he could create the model all by himself. Yeah I am being serious. When I watch him play a game on the ipad he gets higher scores than I am even able to! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">"Pattern Savant" </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">You should see the unique ways Colton creates a design or pattern. In fact I do have just one example I have photographs of I will share them here in this post. Colton creates these "lines" and models of intrigue.If he lines up trains they always have a certain order,grouping and color co-ordination.It's pretty unique and he always has to have things "just so". I won't be surprised if he becomes a mechanic or engineer of some sort. Here's an example:the first picture is how I have these items set on my dresser everyday and the next are of what Colton does with them.It may not seem like much to you but he does this <u>every day</u>. Sure it may be a "ritual" of his but I know that it is a "pattern"(perhaps more of a "design model") he has dreamed up in his head. </span><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5GPrRgcx-ZjbxWc2X2tHJGPzcHNLn6e6A7Zo-EohJmUS7B3RIenWxJrUlE5XOGCr_fIjnym8xbM4aXrW6JtTNwV4tid-clJxkbFrtDvjKigZ0lH35GAQzC_wlxK8d94zMSF3wM94VfHM/s1600/bl4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5GPrRgcx-ZjbxWc2X2tHJGPzcHNLn6e6A7Zo-EohJmUS7B3RIenWxJrUlE5XOGCr_fIjnym8xbM4aXrW6JtTNwV4tid-clJxkbFrtDvjKigZ0lH35GAQzC_wlxK8d94zMSF3wM94VfHM/s320/bl4.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">How I Have This Set Everyday</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLqjK49ilKaRE0KYi4WRBm3ZdqNTME47f7ZWGbQnKRuA4w4-uREZ0c9avddkK8WiymSo5clht6pf1FFR4Yueu5Crk624ljJ8J8ty_U2sHMi87dJAGEvUzoBzk_41RO8aF6AOCH5Ljl1k0/s1600/bl5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLqjK49ilKaRE0KYi4WRBm3ZdqNTME47f7ZWGbQnKRuA4w4-uREZ0c9avddkK8WiymSo5clht6pf1FFR4Yueu5Crk624ljJ8J8ty_U2sHMi87dJAGEvUzoBzk_41RO8aF6AOCH5Ljl1k0/s320/bl5.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Coltons "Work"</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIgb91DDGqVshmkaW1OD5v6HjsKyHhhmONsZ29boWqK-EWw4TaOl2fL2aLRW1Bi4_DqJV8e0qHTL482hck_S1sLVkCSUDJ4NLTggF2bP_ETtZ_fyguU5GM7LMOWiaqKolL1ty9xZOwPFo/s1600/bl6.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIgb91DDGqVshmkaW1OD5v6HjsKyHhhmONsZ29boWqK-EWw4TaOl2fL2aLRW1Bi4_DqJV8e0qHTL482hck_S1sLVkCSUDJ4NLTggF2bP_ETtZ_fyguU5GM7LMOWiaqKolL1ty9xZOwPFo/s320/bl6.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Yes that is an adorable picture of him in the frame right? :)</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Kind Of "In Closing" </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I could go on and on about the many beautiful and amazing things Colton does and how wonderful he is but that would be giving it all away at once right?! Plus he's only 2,imagine how much more I will learn from him,about him. I'm so excited for that,he has to be hands down the greatest teacher I have ever had. Some of you who may personally know me know that I'm not the most patient person in the world and that I can be almost neurotic about certain things but with Colton I find more and more calm in my life. It's not because I have to (although you kind of do) but because I can't help it. My only wish is for the world to see him and all the joy and intelligence he brings. Everyone believes their child is destined for amazing and big things. I know my son is. All he needs is the chance just as every child does. Thanks for reading and for all of your support! </span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-57308603741445331602013-10-13T23:30:00.001-07:002013-10-13T23:31:32.083-07:00The Problems Many Autism Families Are Facing<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Some Problems We Face </span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> </span></h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I could in all honesty make this post pretty long. As with any challenge in life we face many obstacles dealing with it. Some small, others big. This is a "generalized" outline. Just as I have said before every child with autism is different and the same goes for every family unit involved. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Insurance Problems </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">If you are one of the lucky ones who live in Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, Arkansas, California, Colorado, Connecticut,
Delaware, Florida, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana,
Maine, Massachusetts, Michigan, Missouri, Montana, Nevada, New
Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode
Island, South Carolina, Texas, Vermont, Virginia, West Virginia, and
Wisconsin your insurance more than likely covers some if not most treatment options. If you live in Washington like me you are facing the fact that most insurance companies here do not and are not required to cover any percentage or treatment. And again if you are like me and have a two parent home with two small yet modest incomes you can forget getting any help from the state. To be fair we don't have it the worst. These states do not have specific insurance coverage mandates for autism
spectrum disorder and either do not have a mental health parity law or
that the mental health parity law does not include autism spectrum
disorder as a covered mental illness:South Dakota and Wyoming.This more than likely could mean that there is actually not any option for these parents unless they can receive state benefits. It's downright scary. While I am not one who tends to accept this notion that there is an "epidemic" of autism,it should be recognized as a major enough condition to be allowed the same benefits as say bipolar disorder or major depression. We have a whole generation of children coming up who have been properly diagnosed or better yet they are getting diagnosed younger and younger so this should be enough to warrant a chance for these children(I am not ignoring the fact that there are many adults with autism who are experiencing this as well). </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Know It All Doctors </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">If you again are like me you may have brought your concerns to your child's pediatrician and been brushed off. Too many general practice doctors and the like are not trained enough to recognize these signs. Maybe I'm being tough on them but I figure if you have an M.D. and can deliver a baby shouldn't you be trained to see symptoms or signs or better yet trust a mothers instinct? I still can't help but feel that when my son was 18 months old and we were sure that something was going on we should have gotten a proper referral. That would have made Colton's wait time so much shorter. That leads me to my next topic.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Waiting Lists </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Nothing is more frustrating than finally getting a referral or getting a diagnosis and seeking out treatment to be hit with huge wait list times. I've heard everything from 6 months to <u>2 years</u>! When you read up on autism and the very positive and almost crucial effects that early intervention can have this is almost devastating. I'm really not sure how much I can give advice to these practices on shortening waiting periods but I do know that this is a huge obstacle to deal with! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Your Marriage Or Single Parent Life </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> This one is pretty obvious. Statistically 80% of marriages between parents of an autistic child end in divorce. When you are dealing with a child who is like mine and requires almost constant attention this can cause your other relationships to go by the sideline. That being said I cannot even begin to imagine what the single parents out there are dealing with. I cannot imagine tackling this all on my own. These parents must be some really strong people and I have the upmost respect for them. </span><br />
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<h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Your Social Life </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I suppose this can also include extended family life. Imagine all your friends or family getting together to spend some quality time or even have playdates. This is an almost impossible thing for myself personally to enjoy. Now imagine that you have a child who refuses to let you "visit" with others or even let you sit still for two minutes. Also imagine that your child is afraid of just about everything in the surrounding and even the people present. Imagine that they are either whining,yelling,humming,or crying pretty frequently. Yeah doesn't usually make people want to invite you to things. Also doesn't make you want to try to go through the battle of even attempting to. Imagine feeling like you feel that you need to warn people about your child and how things may be. None of that sounds very fun does it? </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The "Comparison" Game </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Now I do not like admitting it but I know I can't be alone in this thought but I am guilty of comparing my child to other children his age..<u>often</u>. It can be painful to watch other children tell their parents "I love you" or even simpler "I want that". I hate every time I hear a parent tell someone else "I wish they would be quiet for two minutes". Hey I just wish my son could ask for milk, I wish my son would ask me "Why" over and over again. They always tell us not to play this "comparison" game but I think every parent not just parents of autistic children are guilty of this. It's hard to watch my son be unable to "scoop" buckwheat with a small bowl at co-op preschool or join in on "imitation songs" during circle time while I watch every other child there do them. I try my hardest not to do this especially since I have recently begun to feel like my son has started to realize he is different and seems to feel more detached from the world. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Lack Of Affection </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">This may be true for some and not for others. For me it is pretty true which of course hurts. I remember nursing my son when he was little and trying to catch his eyes or stroke his skin. He absolutely hated it. When he had colic I tried warm "skin to skin" baths or "baby massage",again he couldn't stand it. Many times when I ask for hugs or kisses I'm either rejected or I get his back turned when he does get close. When my son gets a "boo boo" he refuses to even let me "kiss and make it better". How does one fight their motherly intuitions? I'm pretty sure it's impossible. We all know our children love us,it's just in their own way.Not the way I was hoping but it won't stop me from trying. I can only hope that those rare moments it seems like he may be trying to show affection will become more frequent in time but either way I love him and I know he loves me. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Feeling A Lack Of "Support" </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Before I begin this paragraph I would like to mention that I have been blessed to have some great people in my life who are very supportive. That being said I think those of you out there like me know that it isn't really quite as much or even the way we would like it to be. When first telling some people about our son we were met with a lot of "rationalization" or "well all kids do this or that" or the dreaded "well we all must be because that's "typical". I try to see it from these persons' points of view,most people do not want to be negative or even "realistic". The fact of the matter is that we as parents know our children best. We spend the largest amounts of time with them. I think this particular issue only really bothers me because as a parent I feel like I'm being made to feel that I don't know my own child. That I'm not experienced enough. That I am over-reacting. Obviously none of those things make me feel that great,or supported. Yes everyone is certainly entitled to their own opinion but I'm under the belief that when it comes to parenting no one knows anything more than the next because all of our children are so different,autistic or not. I also believe that sometimes opinions shouldn't be spewed out if it's a touchy subject unless of course they have been asked for. It can totally leave one feeling a lack of support. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Another unfortunate way is to "distance" yourself away from the "problem". It kind of hurts when you tell close ones that you're going through a struggle and they don't seem to make much of an attempt to check in and see how you and your child are doing or to offer help.Or better yet to not even try and educate themselves about autism and the spectrum. Yes that may sound "self-righteous" or that I expect people to just drop their lives to help mine. I want to make it clear that yes while it would be nice for me it's really more for my son that I'm desiring it. I want my son to feel like he can take on the world because he's got this big blanket of love and support around him. People who are trying to "understand" him or just simply enough be involved with him. I mean isn't that what every parent wants? I enjoy hearing about these villages that really do come together to raise children. It's too bad we can't adopt that way of life here. I'm under the belief that we should be a world for children, to take the best care we can of the next generation aka the generation who will potentially take care of us. The generation who will raise our grandchildren,become our doctors etc. It's a lot of work to become a part of Coltons "world" but I have to tell you once you are invited in it is such a wonderful place. I enjoy learning from my son and trying to see things his way. I guess I just wish more people wanted to and perhaps in time they will.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Emotions And Exhaustion </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I figure I would save the most obvious for last. Raising children in general can be tiring and full of emotions. Being the parent of a special needs child is like taking that first notion and multiplying it by oh say <u>one hundred times</u>! Ah the exhaustion:there are so many great things about my son so please don't take this as "complaining" or that I take my son for granted. Again the reason behind this post is just to share some of the struggles. For me personally my day includes lots of fun with my son and joy but that being said I'm have to estimate that more than sixty percent of our day includes whining,tantruming,crying,biting/hitting/kicking and of course the moments where Colton completely "shuts down". Whew just thinking about all that makes me exhausted. Yes a lot of those are common among this age range,the frequency however, are not. It's almost like an evolved version of infant colic but now it's (for me anyway) a 30 pound boy who can now express himself "physically". </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The other part:emotions. While I kind of previously outlined some such as: devastation by lack of insurance,extreme concern over waiting lists, and the pained feeling of the lack of affection there are also some other that should be noted. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The depression: from the first time you heard the diagnosis to the realization that your child may not be doing or even be able to ever do all of the things you were imagining. The feeling of loneliness or isolation. The hurt that you feel for your child. None of these things are easy. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The anxiety: Will he ever get married? Will he have kids? Will they be autistic? Will he go to a normal school? Will he go to school on time or be held back? Tie his own shoelaces? Talk? Yes these are just some of the questions you may worry over and while of course there is no sense in worrying so early on, it doesn't mean that we won't do it. Heck, I'm a natural "worrywart"! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">The fear: How will we pay for this? How will other people accept our son? Will they accept him? Will they accept the autism (or even autism diagnosis)? How will they treat him or us? All parents worry about things like their children being accepted or respected. For me personally I worry about how much more this may make my son a target for bullying,abuse and feelings of major depression. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">In Closing </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">If you actually read this very long one,thank you! I know that this may make me out to look very negative or too opinionated but hey it is my blog right?! There are so many positive and wonderful things about having a child on the spectrum. Never fear I will make a post just for those things here soon. Now in closing I would like to leave you with a pretty good article that reverberates much of what I have written here. Enjoy and as always thank you for your support! P.s. Check the pictures at the end! :) </span>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><b>Parents of children with autism: We struggle alone </b>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">By MICHAEL E. YOUNG / The Dallas Morning News myoung@dallasnews.com
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><span class="label">Published:</span> 09 August 2010 </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"> Her day might begin at 2 or 3 in the morning, when her
9-year-old autistic daughter, Ashlyn, wakes up next to her. And
from that moment on, Jackie Polvado's life is a full-out
sprint.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"Ashlyn still sleeps with me because it's the only way we can
get any sleep. But I've been up day and night, like when my
daughter was up for 48 hours, screaming," said Polvado of
Keller.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"It's exhausting, and there's no end in sight."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">For families with children with autism spectrum disorders - a
range of developmental disabilities that cause social,
communication and behavioral problems - each day can be emotionally
overwhelming, stress-filled and isolating.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Family and friends shy away. The child's behavior can leave
parents prisoners, trapped at home. If they venture out, passers-by
stare, wondering why the child isn't under control.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"Sometimes, the parents think they're admitting failure when
they ask for help," said Shanel Tarrant-Simone, the single mother
of twin 10-year-old autistic sons. " 'I'm the parent; I should know
how to deal with it.'"But no parent is equipped to do this."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">And while neither of these moms could imagine hurting their
children, they can begin to understand the hopelessness Saiqa
Akhter may have felt when she allegedly killed her two children in
Irving last month, or how overwhelmed a single mother in New York
was to kill her 12-year-old autistic son and then herself.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"People on Facebook were very quick to say, 'Oh my God, how
could she do this?' But I say, how did she get to that point?" said
Tarrant-Simone of Frisco. "The isolation and hopelessness - I've
felt them."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Still, nothing can excuse what these women did, Polvado
said.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"The resources are there - there aren't enough of them, and they
cost money, but there is help," she said.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">But day in, day out, many families with autistic children say
they struggle on alone.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"We don't have other friends coming and offering to babysit our
children," said Clay Boatright of Plano, with wife Carole the
parents of three daughters, including autistic 10-year-old twins.
"They don't have friends inviting them over for sleepovers. What we
have is people saying, 'Wow, that must be tough.' "</span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Years of waiting</span></b><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Unfortunately, the number of ASD cases is soaring. Statistics
from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention say almost
1 percent of children have autism or another ASD. Diagnoses in
Texas increased 400 percent in the past 10 years, a trend that has
officials searching for ways to teach affected students - and pay
for it with the state facing a budget shortfall of up to $18
billion.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Meanwhile, tens of thousands of people with developmental
disabilities in Texas spend years waiting for assistance.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"We're at 300-and-something now," said Tarrant-Simone, "and
we've been on the list for five years."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Boatright said it takes about eight years on average to get to
the top of an assistance list, depending where you live in
Texas.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Dr. Catherine Karni, an associate professor of psychiatry at the
University of Texas Southwestern Medical School in Dallas and
medical director of the outpatient clinic at Children's Medical
Center Dallas, said some of the increase can be explained by a
broader definition of the autism spectrum, which includes
Asperger's syndrome, Rett syndrome and childhood disintegrative
disorder.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"So you have severely autistic children and others with
something that doesn't show the full symptoms of autism," Dr. Karni
said. "You have more people." More awareness of autism and better diagnostic tools also
increase the numbers.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"But most likely, there is an increase in prevalence. We don't
know how much, or why. We believe there is a genetic component -
all the research points to that, and this tends to aggregate in
families," she said.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Some speculate that environmental pollution can be a
contributor. Others blame childhood immunizations, though research
hasn't shown any clear correlation, Dr. Karni said. Certain metals
that used to be a part of vaccines have been removed, but cases of
autism continue to increase.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">With the causes unclear, there is no cure. "We have different
treatments. We have behavioral treatments. We use medications in
psychiatry that might help with specific symptoms," Dr. Karni said.
"But they don't cure autism."</span><br />
<br />
<b><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Early diagnosis:critical</span></b><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Early diagnosis and treatment are currently the best ways to
bring improvements, Dr. Karni said.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"Our clinic goes down to 12 months of age, because the earlier
the diagnosis and intervention, the better the result," she
said.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"It's a small window of opportunity - a child's first five years
- because of the plasticity of the brain at that age," she said.
"After the fifth year, the results are not as good."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">But getting an early diagnosis can be difficult.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Tarrant-Simone's sons were born prematurely, but were home
within 11 days and showed all the normal signs of progress except
for speaking.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"At 12 months, it just wasn't coming along," she said. But when
she pointed it out to their pediatrician, she was told, "They're
boys; they're preemies." "You're a mom - you know something is wrong with the child," she
said, "but they were doing all this other stuff - smiling,
laughing, interacting with each other. So a lot of the concerns I
raised were just swept under the rug."</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Polvado's daughter was social, too, and developmentally
advanced. She had no problems with language. "Her first word was
'cat,' " her mom said. But there were mild signs at an early age -
she hated the sound of laughter, even as an infant.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"Then it was a slow progression," Polvado said. "She started
obsessing on eating only certain foods. And her language was
slowing down. It wasn't functional. She could say 'cat,' 'dog,'
'shoe,' but she would never say 'juice' because she was
thirsty. "I knew something was wrong and asked my pediatrician about it,
and he said don't worry about it. Everyone said nothing was
wrong."</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">The American Academy of Pediatrics has worked over the last few
years to educate pediatricians on ASDs, Dr. Karni said.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"Obviously, a child who doesn't talk may have other things, too,
so it isn't easy to make this diagnosis," she said. "The important
thing is to send the child to specialists. Pediatricians need to
have their antenna up and refer these cases."But if that doesn't happen, she said, parents need to find
services on their own.</span><br />
<br />
<b><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">'Happy and healthy'</span></b><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Even if the diagnosis comes too late for early intervention,
parents like Boatright believe that appropriate kinds of education
can provide the life skills their children need."As kids are diagnosed and progress through the school system,
we need to identify what their true skills and talents are,"
Boatright said. "What are their strengths? What do they like to do?
How can that be enhanced and made marketable?"</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">The need for proper programs is a national issue that needs
immediate attention, said Rita Shreffler of Nixa, Mo., executive
director of the National Autism Association.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"Almost 1 percent of the kids in this country have autism," she
said, "so what do we do?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"A study a few years back said the lifetime cost of care for
individuals who need round-the-clock help is $3.2 million," she
said. "I don't think people realize that 1 in 110 children or even
more have an ASD, and they're coming of age. So it's important that
we find treatment."Otherwise, this will fall to the taxpayers, at $3.2 million
each."</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Naturally, the future hangs most heavily on the parents of
autistic kids.Will there be a cure someday? Who will care for their child when
they are gone? Can the child find friendship, happiness?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"I have a motto in my life: There's no such thing as false
hope," said Polvado, who with her husband, Lamarque,publishes a
magazine called Connections Kids to provide a list of available
services. "I hope for the best. I hope Ashlyn will recover and find
her dream job, get married and have children. That's always going
to be my hope. "Then, of course, there's reality. The reality is we may not
achieve that. So we take it day-by-day, hour-by-hour. I'm hoping
for recovery, I'm working for recovery. But if in 10 years she can
function but needs assistance, I'm OK with that.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">"I just want Ashlyn to be happy and healthy." </span><br />
<br />
<b><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">AUTISM NUMBERS </span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;"><br /></span></b>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">•Roughly 1 percent of children in the United States - 1 in
110 - have an autism spectrum disorder, with developmental
disabilities running from slight to severe.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">•ASDs occur in children of all racial, ethnic and
socioeconomic groups, but disorders are four to five times more
likely in boys than girls.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">•Studies of identical twins show that if one has an ASD,
the other will be affected 60 percent to 96 percent of the time. In
nonidentical twins, if one has an ASD, the other is affected 0
percent to 24 percent of the time.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">•Parents who have a child with an ASD have a 2 percent to 8
percent chance of having another affected child.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">•A 2009 report showed that 41 percent of children with an
ASD also had an Intellectual Disability - an IQ of 70 or below.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">•About 40 percent of children with an ASD don't talk at
all, and an additional 25 percent to 30 percent have some words at
12 to 18 months of age and then lose them. Others may speak, but
not until later in childhood.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">•On average, medical expenses for someone with an ASD are
about five times higher than for those without an ASD.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">SOURCE: U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Resources</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Many websites offer information on ASDs, from support groups and
service providers to age-specific information that could help
indicate whether a child has a disorder.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">U.S. Centers for Disease Control: www.cdc.gov/
ncbddd/autism/index.html</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Autism Society of America: www.autism-society.org/</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Dallas Chapter:www.autism-society.org/dallas_chapter</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Collin County Chapter: autism-ascc.org</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">First Signs: www.firstsigns.org </span><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-37842064153172181052013-10-11T16:52:00.000-07:002013-10-11T17:07:23.204-07:00Just Wanted To Share :)<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Some Good Information And Worth A Smile </span></h2>
<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"> </span></h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I have of course spent countless hours researching about Autism and signs,effects etc. etc. I have stumbled upon all kinds of information. Some scary and almost "fanatical" ,others very helpful and even worth a few smiles. I thought I would share some today. Enjoy! </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I would also like to mention I recently read an ebook by Alan Yau called "Autism-A Practical Guide For Parents"</span>. <span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">It is geared towards parents but anyone who is involved in an autistic childs life could benefit from it. It's free so check it out.</span> <a href="http://autismsparks.com/">http://autismsparks.com/</a><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-72767806925764650992013-10-10T16:19:00.000-07:002013-10-10T23:28:27.202-07:00Telling The World<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Sharing Our News </span></h2>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New",Courier,monospace;">Today was another big day for us. Today is the day this blog went public and also the day we told everyone that is in our lives. The responses I have already received</span> <span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">have been so positive and encouraging. We also went and made an account at BECU for Colton aka "Colton Restad Benevolent Account"</span> <span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">and we made a "GoFund" webpage that deposits donations directly into that account. I will include the link in this post. It was really nerve-racking to send that message. It's just so much easier for me to write feelings and thoughts than it is to make phone calls. I also don't like feeling like I am coming across as "needy". However when it comes to Colton there is <b>NOTHING</b></span> <span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I wouldn't do for my son. </span><br />
<br />
<h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">On another note: </span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Last night my husband and I watched a wonderful movie about Autism called "Loving Lampposts". I highly recommend it. It may not be the way some parents of autistic children view autism but it reverberates much of the feelings and thoughts I have on it. I totally find myself feeling the same way as the people and parents involved with the "neurodiversity" movement. I believe the best way I can personally advocate for my son is by total acceptance and by not searching for a "cure" but searching for a way to make my son more comfortable in the world. My only job is to be Coltons mother, teacher,comforter,protecter and advocate. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I end this with my thanks to you, those who have taken the time to read my thoughts and feelings and to those who have chosen to join us on our "journey". I couldn't find continual strength through this if it wasn't for you. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><a href="http://www.gofundme.com/4qq4g8">http://www.gofundme.com/4qq4g8</a> </span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-83258370044696846622013-10-07T22:08:00.002-07:002013-10-07T22:08:40.582-07:00Today Was A Rollercoaster<h2>
A Crazy Ride</h2>
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Well today was one of those days. You know the days that you wish you could hit the "reset" button. The hubby let me sleep in today which was nice. I really needed that. Colton seemed to be in a good mood. He was busy lining up his array of toys as usual. I learned that he really seemed to be found of the "Gumby" character and we got a few quiet moments while watching the movie. As it got closer to the time for his OT therapist Erica to arrive he began to get agitated. We had to skip his nap today in order to get this therapy visit which should already tell you that he was going to be a bit moody. Of course at around five minutes before she was due to arrive (therapy is in our home) he starting losing his cool. I could barely hear her knock but at least a couple minutes he was calm albeit very antisocial. It took him about fifteen minutes to warm up to her. After that he did pretty good. She was working on trying to get him to engage in play with her which of course he would do for about thirty seconds and then in typical fashion he would begin to gravitate towards other activities/toys or begin playing by himself. It didn't seem like we made much headway but he was being stable and calm which was a plus. After she left I could see he was still slowly getting closer to "meltdown" status. I had invited my mother and nephew over for dinner which is something I often do since to be honest being alone with Colton five nights a week can be exhausting and at times depressing. Don't get me wrong I love my son and am happy to be with him but ever since these issues began manifesting themselves more strongly and my husband started working nights I have found myself feeling very lonely and drained. He managed to eat dinner somewhat ok and interact with them. After they left we went up to my husbands work to bring him dinner which is something I do every night (isn't he spoiled?). Colton was getting closer and closer to losing it but trying so hard to hang in there, bless his heart. As soon as we left my husband to head home he began to wail, all during bathtime and pajama dressing he was whining. When it came time to lay him down he was melting down. Tonight was especially difficult. I'm not proud of it but after an hour of trying to console him I had to leave him to cry it out. Sometimes this only takes ten to thirty minutes before he falls asleep but tonight it was over an hour. I always am left feeling so bad and sad that I have to do this. I wish I could console him like other mothers can and that he would find comfort in me. Finding comfort and affection from me is rarely soothing to him. This of course is a low blow to me. I know he can't help how he deals or views things but of course I still have my motherly love and intuition to battle with. Well it's back to work for me tomorrow at least in a couple days I will get to begin my ten days off in a row. It is much needed. Colton does so much better when I have more consistency at home with him. I hate that our lives seem to be so limited. We are going to try and meet with a friend and her daughter Wednesday for dinner at a restaurant. Thankfully my husband will be going with us but I'm so worried about how Colton will be. I hate getting looked at by other people like I don't know how to be a parent or watch Colton get looked at like he's a bad child. That's one of the toughest things about Autism. Most of these children appear very normal and healthy but they act out more often than other children and this of course draws much negative stares and attention. Sometimes people even feel the need to talk to me about it. I always want to scream at them "He's just a child and he's having a bad moment. Give him and me a break!!" Why should we be made to feel like such social pariah. Do we need to buy t-shirts that say "Hey this is autism, get a life!?" NO! The world needs to learn to accept and respect my son, not to make my son feel different or detached. I feel so strongly that it is our responsibility (the world) to educate anyone and everyone about special needs persons and disorders because judging us and staring at us are not the answer. By doing this you are not going to make anything better. I think I will end this now. It's been a long day and I've got to go rest up for tomorrow because we just never know what that will hold. All I know for sure is that I love my son and I will advocate for him and autism everyday for the rest of my life.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01901726619003728453noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4479920149832690891.post-9710932696269717852013-10-07T01:02:00.000-07:002013-10-13T15:22:56.736-07:00Where to begin.....<h2>
How It All Started</h2>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I guess the easiest way to begin is well at the beginning. I will go ahead and introduce myself real quick. My name is Dominica and I live in Seattle,Wa. I'm towards the end of my 20's and on marriage number two. I work in retail and for the most part I like it. I frequently use "run on sentences" and probably improper punctuation. I'll ask for forgiveness for that now. I met my husband Justin back in 2009 and even though I was still going through a divorce and although I was desperately trying not to be "in love". With him, I couldn't help it. In April 2010 we began a relationship by June we were living together and by the end of that month we were trying to conceive. Pretty fast huh? Well we fell madly in love and he was fast approaching his 30's and I was going through some medical things so we decided "Hey we want to get married and have a baby. Why not start now?" I became pregnant in September 2010 but wasn't positive about it until October. We were ecstatic. We married January 23rd 2011 and on June 12th 2011 Colton Edward was born.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Ah here we are: the true beginning. My sons first day of life also felt like the first of mine. It was like "all was realized". The first moment I set eyes on him I knew my life was just starting and that it never would be the same again. I didn't know how right I really was.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Labor was difficult as it is for all women. Ten days before my due date I started to throw up everything,even water. We went in to the hospital and I began to run a fever they decided that was a good reason to start the pitocin. For all of you who have experienced it, you know what I mean when I say it is no fun at all. I opted to try and have as natural of a birth as possible. About six hours later and with not much progression of dilation my son went into "distress". They immediately advised me to have an emergency c-section. I was really hesitate but my doctor explained that this could mean a number of negative things such as the cord being around his neck. Naturally I agreed to the procedure. I was still adamantly against the epidural. A little over an hour later my son arrived. 6 lbs 12 oz and 19 inches with a slight jaundice. Once they stitched me up and cleaned him up I immediately started nursing him. He was a natural. The nurses nicknamed him "The breast feeding Champ". I was already so proud. After a three day stay and lots of chafing of nipples (sorry for being explicit) we went home to my moms. Since I had a c-section and my husband wasn't too experienced with babies we thought it would be a good idea. It was during this first week stay that I noticed my son was using nursing more as a means for nourishment than bonding.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Some of you may be thinking "oh she's one of those mothers,the ones who read too much into things". I have to admit,I am not one of those mothers. I said nothing to no one and in fact questioned myself that maybe I thinking too much into it. So I let it go. Fast forward to the sixth week of Colton's life. He still hadn't smiled. Sure he had those "gassy smiles" but not a true smile. That came at about eight weeks. Again I let it go because I thought I was over thinking everything. I should also note that just a few weeks prior we discovered Colton had colic. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">For those of you who have experienced colic you know the chaos and emotional toll it can take. I had decided to take three months maternity leave but after four weeks my husband went back to work. To graveyards. Colton cried from 10:16 pm to 3 or 4 am every night <u>for four months.</u> So many nights of pacing back and forth with him,trying warm baths,playing Enigma songs hundreds of times over. With colic what works for ten minutes of silence one time doesn't work the next. It's safe to say I was having the "baby blues". Thankfully this didn't last forever. Granted we only had about a one week break before the teething began but it was never that bad.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">As the months flew by Colton hit all his milestones right on time. He still had a horrible time going to bed, that really didn't change until he was about twelve months old. Even to this day it can take about twenty minutes to get him down, at this time he is almost 28 months old. He said his first word at ten months. "Mama". After that came "hi", "kitty", and "outside". I loved hearing him talk and babble. He walked at fourteen months, a tad bit late but not too far behind. I continued to nurse him until fifteen months and by then he was only whispering. This is where things became a little alarming.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">At fifteen months Colton stopped talking. Completely. Of course I became worried but comforted myself by thinking "hey, lots of kids might stop because they are perfecting their skills" or something like that. I didn't hear him say another word until he was almost two. By eighteen months he at least was shaking his head for "no" and a month later he began finger pointing as means of communication. When he did talk again it was garbled and very few words. "Uh oh","wow", and "oh yeah" were the extent of his language. I was still concerned but a little relieved by this. At his eighteen month appointment my husband and I had expressed our concerns and were referred to a "early signs/birth to three" program. They in turn told us they couldn't properly evaluate him until he was two. So we waited.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">At two years old Colton finally said a clear word. "No". We this time pleaded to his doctor to refer us the Seattle Children's Autism Center. Yes, we had come to believe that autism was maybe the best explanation to what we were seeing.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I should probably take this moment to explain the signs we found alarming. Other than the loss of speech/garbled limited speech we also noticed our son wasn't playing or interacting like other children. He was afraid of everyone except my husband, my mother and me. He was especially afraid of other children. We couldn't go to a park if there were other children there. Our son would scream and thrash about if there were. He had also began to become obsessively attached to certain toys,parts of toys and even songs. He didn't play with toys the same way other children do. He would spend hours lining up trains, the same way and pattern each time. He would become very upset if he or they were disturbed. He didn't show us much affection. We felt as if we were forcing him to hug and kiss us. He didn't want to engage us in play, he preferred to be by himself. These are realistically only a few things but certainly enough to warrant our concern. His doctor agreed and put in the referral.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Waiting</span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">We contacted the autism center and were told it was about a three month wait for an evaluation. Thankfully while I was on the phone with them there was a cancellation. We had an appointment for August 7th 2012. We met with a nurse practitioner who got his history and observed him a short time. She found that there was sufficient evidence to see that there were indeed symptoms of autism present. We were then informed it was a <u>nine month wait</u> to be seen and officially diagnosed. We were upset to say the least over learning this. She had also suggested the "Birth To Three" program so we called and made an appointment with them for September 12th 2013. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Birth To Three Aka "Skip"</span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">We went to our local "Skip" office and had an evaluation done. It is good to note that they do not formally diagnosis. They only look for developmental delay. Colton reached, if not exceeded the criteria to qualify him for the program. It took about another month to begin the therapy, we are getting the first therapy session tomorrow. It is also good to note that at this time we had sought out another center to receive an official diagnosis and were about to get it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">The Diagnosis</span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">We had Colton tested at The Center in Federal Way this occurred over the course of two appointments. One to get background, the other to observe and "test" him. This was a very trying process to go through, I felt like we just had to sit there and talk about all the things our son couldn't do. It was just so much..negative. So much crying,feelings of depression and confusion at times as well. We had figured that it might be a good time to call our insurance and ask how autism related therapy was covered, just in case. We were angry and devastated to learn that they <u>would NOT cover anything related to autism whatsoever.</u> We then decided to check out what the state could offer. Again, we got hit with "we can't", apparently because my husband and I had tried to create a "modest" life for our son they refused to help, even though our insurance company turned their backs on us. This create so many feelings in me I can't even begin to describe them. Although we hadn't received the official diagnosis yet I knew in my heart that Colton is autistic. Sure enough on October 3rd 2013 we received the news. They placed Colton at level three(most severe) but due to his age they felt it appropriate to clinically write in the report level two. Even though we were expecting this it's like with anything else, you just can't prepare enough. What has followed has been a range of emotions. From stress to exhaustion. We will go forward with treatment regardless of the fact that it will all be out of pocket. It's worth it for our son. We don't wish to "cure" him, we just want him to have the tools and help he will need to navigate life. We wish for the world to accept and respect him.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Present</span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">We have a long road ahead and while I'm not sure what exactly it is that I am trying to do here at the very least I am telling our story, his story. This blog is intended to come from my views. That means that if you are here to preach or push your opinions please leave. This is a place for story telling, for kindness. I don't care what your beliefs are, what you think of autism. If it's causes are vaccines,gluten etc. All are welcome here. Preaching and hating are not. I believe just as every child is different every parents experiences are different and every possible cause that may be for that child are different. In my own experience I'm keen on believing that my son's autism has been present since birth and that there may even be something there genetically. See I fall very slightly on the spectrum myself. All I can tell you that I know for sure is that Colton has autism but it does not have him. I will do anything for my son and to me he is perfect. I think this may be a good place to stop for now. More to come later. Thanks for reading. </span><br />
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