Monday, December 16, 2013

Ups And Downs

Ups And Downs 

I know it's been awhile since I've written an update but as you can all imagine my life can be busy, especially during this hectic time of year. We have been going through a lot some positive and some negative. Like they say you can't taste the sweet without the bitter. I'll start with the bitter so we can get past that quickly. 

The Bitter 

So I'm sure I have mentioned some of Colton's behavioral problems before but it seems that the older he gets, the more cognitive he becomes the more it seems to manifest itself. It's so hard to watch him feel the need to hurt himself,others,animals and objects. It's almost like he sets up a mission in his mind to be "mean" and can't stop until the task is completed. This is exactly why it is so important to get ABA therapy or at the very least some behavioral help from a therapist/specialist. It's just so hard to have this child who does these things who you can't seem to find the right way to teach to discipline. We can't even get him to look into our eyes let alone know that we are being serious. It's exhausting. It's hard enough for anyone to have a toddler they are a lot of work but when you have an ASD toddler it's like ten times the work and stress. Okay I think I can get past that now, I really needed to vent. 

On another "bitter" note we discovered that even though we finally got a caseworker through our private insurance she's just as clueless as everyone else. She had to e-mail me twice to learn about what ABA therapy was and what ABA stood for. Yeah,twice. To top that off we found out we do not qualify for legal aid to try and sue for these benefits due to the fact that we are income ineligible and have private insurance which they don't have "funding" for currently. It seems like we just can't win sometimes. 

The Sweet 

As I promised there is a rainbow after every storm. Colton is learning many words and very rapidly. While he still can't seem to put two words together it is becoming very apparent just how high functioning and intelligent he is. I can't say enough wonderful things about early intervention. I feel like our son is on his way to being a poster boy for it. He has already come such a long way in a short amount of time and that creates a lot of positivity for all of us. 

We also went to our first support group a few weeks ago. It was one through WAAA which I have mentioned previously, again they are a wonderful organization and if you live in Washington I urge you to look into them and join their network. It was so comforting to be in a room with other moms like me sharing their stories and thoughts. I just wish I had a way to enjoy this once a week and not just once a month. I left there feeling so empowered and ready to tackle everything I have to. 

We are also getting our own caseworker through DDA and while of course this doesn't mean a whole lot since they already have their hands so full it's at least a good feeling to know that we are beginning the long and arduous journey that comes with waiting lists through the state we are really hoping that something could come through for our son. The basic health need waiver would be a godsend. I will just continue to think positive but practical and say lots of prayers!

Earlier this month we took Colton on his first train ride. It was the Santa Train Special Needs Ride from North Bend to Snoqualmie. It was amazing. Not only did my son smile the biggest smiles the entire time but he actually got over his fear of Santa and had a blast. It was also my first train ride as well and I loved that we got to share that together. I can't wait to take him on more train rides. It was worth it and exceeded my expectations! 

In Closing 

I know we have a long road ahead and there are still many battles to fight and obstacles to overcome but it is always worth it. Colton will always be worth it. He is truly my superhero. He has overcome so much and continues too. I am so amazed and fascinated by him. He is truly a joy and such a blessing in my life and in every life he touches. People gravitate towards him and I believe that will come to be a great strength for him. As always thank you for reading this and your continued support. Have a happy holiday and enjoy it with those you love, I know I will.